I actually think I may not have even ovulated this month. I'm 16 days into my cycle and was so overly-caffeinated this month i think i probably skipped the ovulation altogether. Understandably, my boyfriend is a little worried this is a bad time for me to try to get pregnant (he already has 2 kids and is having a hard time making ends meet in this economy). I was like, "don't worry honey, I probably won't get pregnant this month - I'm doing like, every 'anti-fertility' thing - drinking coffee, stressing out, not taking any more fertility supplements because i ran out and can't afford to buy any more. And i haven't given up alcohol entirely, either. Anyway, I know he's thinking, yeah, RIGHT, as soon as I give him the "don't worry honey" speech I'll probably get knocked right up. But seriously. I've never felt more INfertile in my life.
I also took a bunch of diet coke home from work - they were getting rid of it because it was past the expiration date (as if I care about that). I remember looking at all those cans, thinking, if i actually keep these in my kitchen i'll probably end up drinking them all and that would NOT be good for my fertility...
And that's exactly what I did.
I am so stressed out right now, because of money. I took a job that doesn't pay all my bills (but I did so because I needed the free time in the AM to work on another business venture that's hopefully about to come to fruition). I KNEW it was going to be a tough few months until I started making money with this side project. And sure enough - yeah, it's been super tough. I've had to borrow money from friends and family and it just makes me sick, I really hate having to do that and it bothers me so much every day that I can't pay everyone back right now. It seems like the stress is just compounding itself. I honestly can't picture myself being able to get pregnant when my body is in this kind of state.
I am so stressed out, and also broke, that I can't afford to do a lot of things I think could help my fertility - like seeing a fertility doctor, or a chiropractor, or continue to take FertilAid, FertileCM and Maca (I've run out of the first two and still have some maca but will probably run out soon). I couldn't even conceive of taking clomid. I can't even afford the co-pay for a regular doctor right now. I am just really hoping that things will change within the next month or two. I've been putting a lot of work into this side business and if it pays off, I am just praying I will be able to pay everyone back and my body will be able to get to a state where I can actually conceive.
On a side note - the fertility statues are actually on tour right now and will be in San Francisco in April, I believe. I am really hoping I'll be in a better situation by then!!
Hi Ladies! Thanks for visiting my blog, which I started in 2008. In January of 2012 I got pregnant for the first time, at age 43, after 5 years of trying to conceive. I always wanted to do it “the natural way,” without the assistance of IVF or fertility doctors, for many reasons. They say you can learn a lot from other people’s mistakes... but more than anything, I hope you will learn from my successes! Thanks again for stopping by, and best of luck in your own journey to TTC!
Monday, February 9, 2009
Mid-Cycle Bleeding
I get this quite a bit now (though I never really got it during my 20's or 30's). I have heard that this is fairly common but have started to think maybe it's something I should look up. The bleeding seems pretty regular now - I almost always get it about 2 weeks after the first day of my last period. Not enough to count as a period, but it seems that the egg-white cervical mucus is often tainted with a small amount of blood. There was one time, a few months back, where I thought maybe it was implanation bleeding, but I know it could have just been normal spotting in my cycle.
Anyway, here's a pretty good link I found online:
http://pregnancy.lovetoknow.com/wiki/Bleeding_During_Ovulation
They actually said that if you have mid-cycle bleeding every month, you may be able to predict when you'll ovulate. Cool! But they did say you should make sure the bleeding isn't caused by something else, like fibroids, etc..
If I could actually afford to see a doctor or fertility specialist right now, I would. But due to some financial things going on in my life right now, i just can't afford it. Even though I have health insurance, I can't even afford the co-pay at this time. I'm hoping that things will be a lot better for me in a few months (I have a business that's just starting to take off), but for the past few months I've been seriously scraping by. I am hoping that when the stress in my life is reduced, it'll be easier for me to get pregnant. At age 40 I can't be dicking around too much longer!
Anyway, here's a pretty good link I found online:
http://pregnancy.lovetoknow.com/wiki/Bleeding_During_Ovulation
They actually said that if you have mid-cycle bleeding every month, you may be able to predict when you'll ovulate. Cool! But they did say you should make sure the bleeding isn't caused by something else, like fibroids, etc..
If I could actually afford to see a doctor or fertility specialist right now, I would. But due to some financial things going on in my life right now, i just can't afford it. Even though I have health insurance, I can't even afford the co-pay at this time. I'm hoping that things will be a lot better for me in a few months (I have a business that's just starting to take off), but for the past few months I've been seriously scraping by. I am hoping that when the stress in my life is reduced, it'll be easier for me to get pregnant. At age 40 I can't be dicking around too much longer!
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