Thursday, December 20, 2012

Pregnancy Boobs, weird cravings, and worrying about an ectopic (again)


I'm not sure if it's the progesterone cream I'm using or an actual pregnancy, but something is definitely going on with my boobs.

Last night at about 4am, my husband had to get up to go to the bathroom, and he accidentally pushed himself up by putting his hand on my left boob. Normally, this would make me go "Ow!"  But last night I sprang awake sounding like a machine gun of OWs..... "OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW!"  

It seems like when your hormones are going nuts, your boobs just feel any kind of pain with a greater, amplified intensity that you can't quite imagine until someone gives them a good whack.

It might sound funny to be saying all this, when I don't even know for sure that I'm pregnant. I just took a pregnancy test, and got a BFN (yes I was kidding myself that I could wait two weeks to take one). I have to remind myself that it hasn't even been a week since I got a definitely-positive ovulation test.

But I've sure been feeling some weird symptoms. Not just the boob thing. Yesterday I was walking around with a slight sense of nausea, though I realize it could be my brain just playing tricks on me. Also, I've had insomnia every night, since that first night I woke up around 4am with some strange hormonal surge and couldn't get back to sleep. Another thing is, last night my hubby and I were watching the travel channel and they were showing what different American Fast Food chains serve as "regular food" in different countries. Normally this might kind of gross me out, but it seemed like every other thing made me go, "mmmm." I was craving a grilled cheese sandwich but we didn't have any bread. My sweet hubby offered to use one of the hot dog buns we had, though I didn't think that sounded very appetizing (though i have to say he is a GREAT cook). So he made me a bagel with egg, tomato and spinach. It was delicious.

Just as I was writing this, I felt a very sharp pang. Not quite like mittleschmerz, but in a different location... almost like where you would picture your tubes would be. I've always been a little paranoid that I could wind up with an ectopic pregnancy. And I'm especially concerned this time, because when I took an HCG test, I am pretty sure it was my right side that was somewhat blocked, but my left side was fine. Well, this is the first time I can remember ever feeling like I was ovulating from my right side (and I felt like I was ovulating from the left also) So I realize I could be at at an even higher risk for an ectopic, than the last time.

I did some more research to find out, if for some reason I did have an ectopic pregnancy, is there a chance that it could resolve itself. Meaning, could it just spontaneously abort without me having to have a tube removed? And it seems that the answer is, yes, it's possible. 

I think if this were to ever happen to me - if I found out that a pregnancy was definitely an ectopic, then I would start drinking parsley tea and vitamin C like crazy (two things that are known to end a pregnancy). The thought of a doctor going in there and removing a tube really scares me. Of course it would make me sad to have to take measures to end any kind of pregnancy, so I don't mean to sound crass or insensitive about it. I just don't want to jeopardize my own life in the process of trying to get pregnant. And you have to think about these things when you don't have health insurance! My husband and I have talked about getting it if and when I do get pregnant, but I don't have it yet. 

I wonder if going running could help move the egg along, and keep it from implanting in the wrong place. I've been doing a lot of "spinning" lately (opting for an exercise bike vs. running, because it's not as hard on my back) but now I feel like putting my running shoes on and going out for a jog...

Will keep you posted on how all this goes.

EB