DAMMIT, I'M OVULATING!!!! And the hubby is at work.
I swear to god, this "trying-to-get-the-timing-just-right" thing drives me nuts.
I had mittelschmerz on Sunday, I swear. It was a very obvious, sharp pain on my left side, that lasted about 5 minutes (on and off). But the ovulation tests I took around that time, for the next 2 days, showed NOTHIN was going on. I was not fertile. It just didn't happen.
I thought I just plain missed my window of opportunity this month. Especially after I did a whole bunch of research about how, if you have sex right after Mittleschmerz, it's probably already too late. But I had sex anyway, just to be sure. I had sex on Sunday, Monday, AND Tuesday! Even when I was sure I had missed my window of opportunity, since my cervix was hard and closed, and the test strips basically said, "Sorry sister."
So, I couldn't help but think of all the reasons I probably was done ovulating, and had missed my opportunity, or that I just wouldn't ovulate this month. I ran several miles on the day I felt Mittelschmerz. It must have made the egg slide right out of me. Or maybe I just wouldn't ovulate at all, because this month, I drank too much Caffe D'Vita Mocha Mix from Costco, and in the past that stuff would seem to throw off my ovulation cycle.
This was the first time in 3 days that I didn't have sex. And wouldn't you know it, when I went to the bathroom this morning, RIGHT after the hubby drove off to work, I found I had a huuuuuge amount of cervical mucus on the toilet paper (it was almost like jelly). So I took an ovulation test, and it was POSITIVE. And I don't just mean "sort of positive." I mean, "that-second-line-was-even-darker-than-the-first-line, Positve." Have a look:
I will admit, last night about 8:00, when I was putting away the groceries, I felt a teeny little "pang" in my ovaries. It wasn't a huge one - not nearly as sharp as the one I felt on Sunday morning. But I did notice it. I was running out of Fertile CM, so I took 3 Oil of Evening Primrose tablets, just to be on the safe side (I wanted to save the few Fertile CM tabs I had left, for later this month, in case I needed them).
I think a part of me was just a little frustrated, that I suddenly felt Mittelschmerz again, because... sometimes, it seems like the Fertility gods are just f---ing with me. It was hard to believe this little "pang" in my ovaries would turn out to be a legitimate "fertility warning sign" when the last one turned out to be a false alarm. And I didn't even feel any cervical mucus on the toilet paper or anything like that. I actually felt pretty dry.
I wound up going to watch TV with my husband, and we were very lovey dovey and holding hands and COULD have had sex, but... I fell asleep on the couch. By the time he woke me up, we were both ready for bed. I was thinking maybe we could "do it" in the morning, but we woke up late, and he had to rush off to work.
ARRRRGH!!!
Ladies, please don't make the same mistake I just did. If you think there is even the TINIEST chance you might be ovulating, DON'T WAIT. Don't put it off till tomorrow. Don't fall asleep on the couch. Even if your ovulation test strips HAD been saying you're not ovulating. Keep testing. Never forget, the fertility gods love to laugh and yell, "PSYCH!!!!"
The moment you think you might be ovulating, you need to RIP YOUR MAN'S CLOTHES OFF AND BANG HIM LIKE A SCREEN DOOR IN A HURRICANE.
I wish I had a padded "love van" I could drive to my man's workplace and meet him for lunch (Somebody should seriously do that - as a rental service for ovulating women). I'd probably scare the crap out of him though. A desperate woman in heat is not a pretty sight.
Will let you know what happens...
EB
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