Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Trying Again...

Time to get back on the saddle.

I took an ovulation test this morning and it was positive.

Unfortunately, I'm not so positive, about a few things:

a) I'm still a little scared to get pregnant, because I still don't have health insurance. But I'm working on it. I'm at a temp job and am hopeful that they will bring me on as a permanent employee.

b) Even though the test strip says I'm ovulating, I don't know if there are any viable eggs ready for the sperm right now. For some weird reason, I had miettelshmerz (I know I must have spelled that wrong) DURING my period (which was very heavy), about 2 weeks ago. And the pain was pretty strong, so I'm guessing I released some pretty good eggs... only it was way too early. I think this must be a symptom of still getting over a miscarriage. My body is still out of whack. I haven't experienced any ovulation pain (like I did with the cycle before I got pregnant) so I am guessing that my system may still be a little "off" and it might be several months before things are back to normal. I'm not sure what it is that causes the ovulation test strips to darken, but... the cynical side of me says this could be a false alarm.

c) The quality of my eggs may not be as great as they could be. I've probably been drinking a little too much caffeine this month (just decaf mochas at work, and a coke here and there...but still...). And I'm not taking my visalus vitamins as regularly as I should be. I have been pretty decent about taking coenzyme q10, vitamin d and pycnogenol. But the problem is, the vi-paks don't fit into my pill minder, and then I forget to take them - or I can't take the day paks because I forgot to grab them, rushing out the house in the morning, on my way to work. I'd say I've been taking the Visalus about 70% of the times when i should (the ones I tend to forget are the night packs). But, hopefully, I would think the amount of Visalus pills and shakes I have taken consumed over the last 6 month has helped to improve my overall health and egg quality.

As for the hubby... I think even he was getting a little forgetful about taking his vitamins in the last month. He's usually pretty good about the Visalus, because it's easy and the box is right in his bathroom, and he's a man of method. My hubby is the most methodical dude ever. But if I don't fill up his "pill minder" in the bathroom with the vitamin D and CoEnzyme Q10, he just won't take it. I'm not going to complain about this much because I am just so grateful that he's willing to take them at ALL!!!

So, regardless of whether I'm ovulating or not, we had some really great sex this morning. TWICE. And it's been over a week, so my DH had a good amount of sperm built up. I was really happily surprised to see he was willing to go a second time. I thought he was joking when he suggested it, but nope! I was seriously impressed!

I had decided to take the day off because I was planning to go to an animal rights protest (my first day I've ever requested off work). My boss was really cool with it. But I decided not to go because I couldn't get anyone else on board and it would be a 4 hour drive. I decided to take the day off anyway since I was seriously sleep deprived and had a ton of housecleaning, but then I got caught up on my laptop and haven't gotten out of bed, and it's already 5:30 pm (I woke up at 12:30 pm!). I'd normally be irritated with myself, but I look at it overall like a good thing.

I remember that when I did get pregnant in January, I stayed in bed for a LONG time, just resting and letting the sperm do their thing. I went and bought more Astroglide Natural yesterday, and when I was applying it with my fingers, I could tell my cervix was definitely in the "open" position... it's just a question of, is there a viable egg up there to fertilize? I guess I'll find out. I didn't even use the type of astroglide with Pre-seed in it, because a) I was too tired to hunt down an applicator tube or instead cup and insert it, and b) it seemed like I had a decent amount of lubrication without it. Usually that's NOT the case... especially if we are in the doggie position. But I didn't need any extra this morning. And I also had an orgasm, so things were pretty wet down there.

Again... I am not really expecting to get pregnant this cycle, because I just haven't been doing all the things I was doing the first time I got pregnant. I'm not excercising, not avoiding caffeine entirely (I'd say I consume about 300-500 mg per week), not taking Fertil Plus regularly (I've taken about 5 pills total in this last month) - and I figure I probably will need that stuff in order to get pregnant again.

But it can't hurt to try, right?

The thing that makes me want to go for it now, is... I'm embarrassed to admit this, knowing how stupid it will sound.... but if I got pregnant in this cycle, then my baby would be born in the Year of the Dragon. Which just sounds SO much cooler than the Year Of The Snake, which is the next cycle. I know, pretty silly, right? But I can't help it. My good friend, whom I'll call Jessie, brought it up when I told her I was pregnant. She said, "Oh, the baby will be born in the year of the dragon!" and it sounded so cool... and I was really psyched about it. It doesn't help that I gotta keep seeing pictures of Zena and her damn Dragon Baby all over Facebook!

To console myself, I looked up celebrities born in the Year of the Snake, and the people seem exceptionally beautiful: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FejIm4y7DAE. So there! Take that, Zena and your little Dragon baby (you watch now that I've said that, she's gonna have a THIRD baby in the year of the snake).

I'll be happy with any baby, born in any year. Dragon, snake, or whatever comes after it.

That is all for now.

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